What's Next?

New beginnings...

Or the end of the line?

It doesn’t seem to matter if we’re graduating from high school, college, changing jobs, ending a relationship, moving across country or retiring. We all spend our lives changing, growing and wondering what’s next… and like that gift from a holiday party grab bag...hoping we’ll like what we get.

This blog entry was inspired when one of my high school friends retired. His email to me was “I don’t know what to do with myself.” At 59-60, a man’s life is strangely similar to that of being 29-30. Things get re-evaluated and shifted around. Just like getting a flat tire when you're already late for a meeting, I hit one of those slumps at 59. And even though I loved every minute of my work, I was still demanding of myself to find something new and exciting. Since it didn’t show up when I wanted it to, I decided to find more peace with my life by hitting the gym with a fierce intensity. Something had to change! It worked, my mood lightened up (so did my body), and everything seemed brighter.

Give it to me

But I still wanted something exciting to happen before I turned 60…

So last fall I headed up to the Catskills and started projects on our pre-civil war farmhouse — landscaping, laying stone walks, a new metal roof and painting the whole darn house. The house is always teaching me new lessons about myself, it’s still standing proud with a peaceful face toward every season with its uneven rock foundations, weathered siding, sloping floors and –now – a new silver roof.

Right then, while I was so engaged and happy with simple utilitarian projects and a lot of dirt under my fingernails, the universe granted my request. I received an offer to take my skills as a fitness trainer to the dancers on Madonna’s “Sticky and Sweet” tour in Europe and North America. My partner, Dr. Steven Margolin, was there as Madonna’s chiropractor. Together we made quite the wellness team.

Pre-show abs blast

Really Surreal

One night, before the kick-off of the tour, Steven, Liz Rosenberg (Madonna’s publicist for most of her career) and I sat in three yellow folding chairs in an empty Izod Arena in New Jersey as Madonna and her cast of performers ran through the first dress rehearsal of their “Sticky and Sweet” world tour. Exciting? Yes, and also a little surreal. I had the same feeling every night of the performance thereafter while standing backstage, riding busses between cities I’d never heard of and learning lessons from the Icon of Music who’s lyrics have pulled me onto dance floors most of my life.

At every point in our lives we’re looking for the next thing. This is good. It’s also good to become totally engaged with who we are right now. It allows us to be better, stronger and makes room for something new to show up.

So I was thinking that the best tools for preparing ourselves for the future are really three basic rules for living joyfully in the present:

1. Live with a healthy, fit mind.
2. Keep a healthy, fit body.
3. Enjoy a desire to experience all of life.

It's all good

Most of us get slammed with a realization that we have to look at our lives differently when we’re turning 29 or 30. In astrology, it’s called Saturn return. Physically, our bodies are just starting to change, and we look at our future and past with a new vision. When I was 30, I “came out”. Being married didn’t make it any easier. The only positive thing my dad said about it all came three years later… he thought I should have done it earlier because he’d never seen me happier.

I developed a motto during this time: “It’s all good in the end, if it’s not all good, it’s not the end.”

So wherever you are in life, go for the joy. If it’s one of those uncertain times, take control of the things you can. Get your body as fit as it can be and think good thoughts. If you want some inspiration, just listen and watch the new remix video of Madonna’s “Celebration” with all of her fans strutting their stuff. Find it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZYvXVyUANY

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Tips for “working out” your stuff

• Leave your problems at the gym or yoga studio door. They’ll be there waiting for you, if you want them, when you’re done.
• Wear something that makes you look and feel good. If nothing in your closet works, go out and buy that new tank top.
• Hydrate before, during and after your workout. It’s good for your muscles, and keeps your brain happier and functioning.
• Focus on each movement of each exercise. Be so present in your workout practice that there is no room for other thoughts.
• Before you lift, know how many reps you want to do. Then do them.
• Relax your grip. If you’re doing biceps and your forearms are tight, your mind will think you’re working them instead of your biceps.
• I see so many guys at the gym making horrible faces when they train… if they only knew how unattractive they looked. Be an actor. Put on a stage smile. Stay conscious of your face when you’re working out and you’ll feel more energized. You’ll look better too — and don’t forget, we’re training our face muscles every time we use them!
• Finish your chest, shoulder or leg workout with one or two light back exercise reps. You’ll leave the gym standing taller.
• Do one nice thing for someone at the gym, it might just be a kind word. You’re the one who will feel good when you do it.
• Eat when you’re done. Keep your energy up. You’ll want every bit of it to finish the day.

If none of these work, do what my high school friend does ­­­­— just go fishing.

Train Your Body. Train your Mind. Tame your Tongue.